How can I grow my confidence?
I remember being absolutely terrified of driving.
I remember having random visions come through of what might happen on the road.
What if I knock over a cyclist on a turn?
What if I don’t stop in time for a red light and crash into another car?
What if I forget to check if there were any cars when I was meant to give way and caused someone else to have an accident?
What if I panic and rush onto the highway without giving the cars on the highway enough space and time to slow down?
The idea of driving felt overwhelming to me.
I had to learn how to change gears whilst remembering all the different rules of the road! It felt like so much to remember.
The more fear and images and worries and insecurities came up about driving, the less motivated I was to take lessons.
Man I wanted to avoid it so bad.
My mind was saying, just don’t do it. Don’t learn how to drive. Don’t get in the car.
I was seriously thinking… would it be so bad if I never learned how to drive?
My fear was getting the best of me.
My lack of knowledge and experience was causing me to question my ability to ever learn.
I remember at some point realising, look at some point I’m going to have to learn and build my confidence…
One of the MAIN reasons I finally pushed myself to take driving lessons was because I wanted to be able to help others out (one of my top values is around contribution). For example, helping my mom out to pick up some groceries. Or being able to drive on a long road trip so that someone else can sleep. And so on.
It was time to bite the bullet.
I was very uncomfortable, nervous and afraid. But I guess the need and desire was there to push me off the cliff.
The first lesson was nerve-wrecking. Looking back, I can still remember how tense my body was. After the lesson, I remember thinking man I feel sweaty. Even though I tend not to sweat that much usually!
The nerves and pressure I was experiencing not to mess up or make mistakes was affecting my ability to focus on what was around me.
A few times, the driving instructor had to push on the brake – man it was SO stressful. My heart was pounding the whole 45 minutes!
I really was doing my best and trying so hard. But I felt overwhelmed and really new at it.
I definitely lacked confidence.
Anyway, fast forward to the next lesson. And it was more of the same.
And then the next driving lesson, more of the same.
I made mistakes. LOTS of them. I forgot to check the speed limit so he had to remind me.
I forgot to check the bike path before turning onto a street on the left.
I forgot who had right of way when we went down a few smaller residential roads. The driving instructor let me know that it was actually the other person who had the right of way and I’d gone anyway!
I didn’t go fast enough onto the highway: I was going 50 km an hour instead of 80 or 90 to get on it.
And the list goes on and on. Mistake after mistake. He would correct me. And let me know what I was doing wrong.
At the same time, I was learning the road signs and rules of the road at home in a book.
Every day, I’d grab the book and spend 45 minutes or so memorising as much as I could.
And after about a week of that, I’d do a quiz. I continued making mistakes. And learning from them.
I’d then practice again. And again and again.
Finally, I felt myself get a little calmer. I noticed I was less tense in the car. I felt myself relax a bit more.
Something I also noticed was that I had more awareness of what was going on around me.
My mind would gently remind me to check my mirrors.
I remembered to look for cyclists when turning.
The road signs became more familiar due to the studying and previous errors I’d made.
As the weeks went on, I felt more comfortable. And bit by little bit, my confidence grew.
Now? When I get into a car, I just love it. I don’t even think about being nervous or worried.
The music is playing and I feel very confident driving. I anticipate things well and I can easily stay focused.
It’s kind of crazy to me to think that I went from having SUCH a lack of confidence as a driver to now absolutely LOVING it. And being so confident at the wheel.
The reason I share this story is because I believe building your confidence in business is similar!
Building your confidence doesn’t happen overnight. It takes practice, mistakes, learning, and more practice.
There’s no way around it though – mistakes are going to happen.
And (in my opinion) you can’t just jump from feeling TOTALLY insecure to feeling COMPLETELY confident.
However, with enough bold steps, practice, errors, learning and experience? You ABSOLUTELY can grow your confidence.
I’m sure you can think of an area of your life that you used to feel absolutely rubbish at… and now? You’re an absolute pro. You feel super confident.
Maybe it’s roller blading. Or riding a bike. Or driving a car. Or cooking. Or using excel. Or Google Ads. Or swimming.
I’m sure you can think of something. Do you remember how nervous you used to feel in that arena ?
And do you remember how much you lacked confidence?
You tell me – what did you do to grow your confidence in that specific area? What specific actions did you take? How much practice did you have to put in? Did you make lots of mistakes in the beginning? What did you have to believe?
And what changed for you to feel more competent ?
I want you to think about this because it’s the same in business.
If – right now – you’re doubting yourself in business… And you’re worried you’re not good enough…and you lack self-confidence?
That’s ok. It doesn’t mean your confidence can’t grow.
Just like you’ve done in other areas of your life in the past.
But unfortunately, as you know… it’s going to require getting out there and PRACTICING. Even when it’s really uncomfortable, nerve-wrecking and scary. Taking action is key.
And yes. You’re going to make mistakes. But that’s just part of the game.
The more trial and error. The more reps you put in? The more confidence you’ll gain.
I genuinely know how scary it can be when you’re doubting yourself. I remember how much my own self-doubt would overwhelm me when it came to driving.
My body was just bogged down with so much discomfort. The nerves were all-consuming.
I know how much self-doubt can control your life and your business if you let it. I think it’s because it’s such a visceral feeling.
But this is the thing – I know how much you want the outcome. I’m guessing you have a business goal or at least there’s something you really want to achieve. Am I right?
You and I both know that’s ONLY going to happen if you’re willing to overcome this self-doubt and make tangible progress in your business. Agreed?!
Anyway! I want you to know that you CAN overcome your self-doubt and build your confidence.
Even if it feels crazy and overwhelming right now. You’ve done it before in other areas so you can do it in business too.
I know it’s scary. But I ALSO know that you CAN get there. And it’ll be so worth it when you hit your goal.
Get started now. BEGIN.
Looking for more help? I’ve just made a free guide for you on how to overcome your self-doubt in business. In it, I provide 8 super easy steps that you can work through to build your self-confidence and finally grow your business.
You can grab it here for free: 8 Easy Steps To Overcome Self-Doubt!
Enjoy and let me know if you have any questions in the comments.
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