What to do when you don’t feel good enough in business
So, you don’t feel good enough?
I want to share a new perspective with you that I hope will empower you to get out there and crush it.
A part of you (maybe a bit part) feels like you’re just not enough.
My suggestion for you is that start focusing simply on the number of reps accomplished rather than your level of ability. Let me explain what I mean.
So many of us business owners don’t give ourselves the chance to get better.
We feel like we have to be the absolute best in our industry from the very get go.
We judge ourselves for our current competence level. We judge ourselves for how “good” we believe we are.
However, if you speak to any business owner, writer, or professional athlete, they’ll tell you they’ve improved over time.
They’ll tell you without a doubt in their mind that they are better today than they were when they began.
These successful people will say that each ‘rep’ in their particular field allowed them to improve and to feel better about themselves.
Why is it that you have to be at your best straight away?
Aren’t you allowed to have what they had? Time to improve and gain experience?
What if instead of focusing on how good enough you were now, you could instead simply focus on executing the reps daily?
You could simply focus on your improvement week by week.
Recently, my focus has been on the reps rather than the end result. I’ve learned that if I truly focus on the rep itself (taking action, showing up in my business) and really allow myself to be in the present moment when I’m doing it, I manage to improve my performance over time.
This dawned on me a little while ago in a different area of my life. And I realised how similar it was to feeling “good enough” in business.
Basically, I felt terrified about driving a car. I was nervous, uncomfortable and really didn’t feel good enough.
Now, the truth is that I’d hardly put any reps in, aka I’d had no driving lessons and no practice. Is it a surprise that I didn’t feel good enough? Of course not.
I was completely new at this skill.
A big part of me felt like I had to be “perfect” at driving from the get go though. Like RIGHT NOW.
I wasn’t giving myself any time or practice to get better.
No, I had super high expectations of myself as a driver.
It felt like I needed to be the best driver ever as soon as I sat down in the driver’s seat.
Why? Well – a big part of it was ego. It felt embarassed about being “bad at driving”. I wanted to be good enough right away.
It almost felt as if it should come naturally to me. It felt like I should have some sort of naturally born talent to drive… very odd! I don’t think babies come out of the womb knowing how to drive.
For some reason though, it was imperative that I be amazing from the outset.
When I finally pushed myself to take driving lessons, I felt embarased when I made mistakes in front of the driving instructor.
Looking back, I can see how completely ridiculous this was. That’s why I was paying him: to help me learn from my mistakes. To teach me how I could get better.
If I’d been “amazing”, he wouldn’t have had to be there.
The only way he has a job is that people don’t know how to drive and don’t feel confident in a car. The only way he has a job is the fact that I am making mistakes.
And yet – regardless – I felt insecure and uncomfortable every single time I made too quick a turn. Or when I didn’t check my mirrors enough. Or when I forgot to check for cyclists before driving out of a parallel parking spot.
Luckily, he was really relaxed. Whenever I’d make an error, he wouldn’t flinch. He’d just explain what to do instead.
Me… on the other hand… I’d apologise every 2 seconds for making a mistake.
It was the nerves and the not feeling good enough pouring out!
After my lessons, I’d come home feeling disappointed and discouraged. My progress felt slow and I was frustrated with myself. I still didn’t feel good enough.
Now, this is what I soon discovered. Over time, after each lesson, I’d improve that tiny extra bit. Each lesson I took, I’d learn something new.
My experience grew and surprise surprise, I got better.
It didn’t happen overnight though. And it required action. It required me putting in the reps.
If I’d just THOUGHT about driving a car or taking a lesson, I would never have improved.
I had to be “in the game” to improve and to feel better about myself as a driver.
The only way I ended up feeling “good enough” was by putting in the reps (aka taking driving lessons and then practicing driving).
At some point, I don’t know exactly when (or after which rep), my confidence grew to the point where I didn’t even think about it anymore.
I’d just jump in the car, check my mirrors, and head out. Zero worries. Zero thoughts. Feeling completely “good enough”.
So this is the thing, we can’t expect to be at the highest performance level from the get go. It just doesn’t work like that.
It’s the same for a baby learning to walk. They have to put in the “reps” to get better at moving. It takes balance and coordination. And it requires practice. And lots of mistakes.
Business is the same. Yes – it’s annoying to not feel good enough in the beginning. Yes, it’s annoying not to be able to be at the highest performance from the VERY beginning. Or even a few years in…
But unfortunately, every skill or area of life works like that. You’ve simply got to put in the reps.
So – if you don’t feel good enough? That’s normal. Put in the reps. And instead of focusing on whether or not you feel good enough yet, focus solely on the reps.
Get in the present moment and just take that next small action. And as much as you can, be in the now. Really put all of your attention on that task.
And simply count the reps.
Literally count them down. That’s one rep. The next time you take a small action in business, that’ll be two.
And the next day you take another task on, that’ll be three reps.
Just continue counting the reps.
Focus on the reps. Put all of your attention on the reps. Not on whether or not you have what it takes. Not on whether or not you’re enough.
Just focus on the reps. And trust that with each rep comes a tiny bit of extra skill and a tiny bit of extra confidence.
Rep by rep, your ability and feeling of competence will compound.
And unfortunately – no, there’s no work around here. Trust me, I know how comforting it would be to have a way to avoid this feeling of discomfort and fear and not enoughness.
You’ll have to go through this. It’s part of the game. You can’t escape it.
But know that every single business owner has to go through this too. You’re definitely not alone.
I really hope this gives you the motivation to get back on the horse so to speak and put in the reps in your business. You deserve to live out your fullest potential and it starts…with a rep.
What are your thoughts on this? I’d love to hear your perspective – feel free to share in the comments.
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